And what happened after monday?

After monday and all that memories came the fear. That fear was precedid by a passive feeling. Does the suffix "algia" make any sense?  Yes, from the greek "algos". Pain. Nostos. Coming home. Idealizing things. Nostalgia. That's the word we're lookin' for. The present becames again infiltrated by the past. And the fear also recalls my mind to the future. Present time, struggling between the things that were (but are not anymore) and the things that are going to be (maybe). As the struggle to manage the relationships with another human beings is partially stable, then it cames the inminent change, that will shatter those weak bonds that I try to hold together. I fear the loosing of the little that I have. I fear when I look at the relationships (so called) that I have, because it reminds me things that were, if not ideal, better. But also recalls some ideas. And envy. Envy of the people that had a sense of pertenence. Happy memories shared with friends, partners, romances... I can only recall wanting those things....